An ode to pizza

I was missing pizza long before I went primal. As an East coast transplant to St. Louis, I knew I shouldn’t expect anything on par with the New York-style hybrids that dotted our New Jersey coastline. What I didn’t expect was the profusion of bizarre crust + sauce + cheese chimeras masquerading as pizza all throughout the city. Some are more palatable than others, but none have been able to fill the very specific (wide, thin, triangular) hole in my heart.



Alas, even Pi (a.k.a. President Obama’s favorite pizza), while absolutely delicious, just can’t compete for my affection with the gilded memories of a single slice, slick with oil, charred bottom crunching as I folded it in half. We all have out exceptions: the celebrities you’d sleep with despite being in a committed relationship. I have my East coast pizza, and when I go home in August I am going to eat the hell out of it. Maybe I will stop after one slice, or maybe I will eat until I’m sick (which usually only takes two slices anyway). As a primal-eater with no food allergies, I will allow myself this indulgence with as little guilt as I can muster.

After all, it would be exceedingly difficult to maintain a pizza habit upon returning to St. Louis, unless I suddenly and inexplicably develop a taste for provel.

In the meantime, I make do as best I can.

Primal Portobello Pizza

• 2 Portobello mushroom caps, cleaned
• 2 Tbsp shredded cheese
• ¼ Cup tomato sauce
• Toppings
• Halved meatballs
• Green peppers
• Red onion
• Oregano
• Extra virgin olive oil

1. Preheat oven to 375 degrees
2. Heat up some olive oil in a cast iron pan
3. Add mushroom caps and cook 5-10 minute depending on the size, flipping once while cooking. 
4. Add your toppings. Start with the cheese if you’re using it, then add meat, sauce, and veggies. 
5. Top with a sprinkling of oregano (crushed between your fingers to bring out the flavor) and a drizzle of extra virgin olive oil.
6. Transfer to cast iron pan to oven and cook for another 15-20 minutes until everything is hot and the veggies are cooked to your liking.
7. Eat.